In the satirical tradition of
Catch-22 and
M*A*S*H,
Fobbit
takes us into the chaotic world of Baghdad’s Forward Operating Base
Triumph. The Forward Operating base, or FOB, is like the back-office of
the battlefield – where people eat and sleep, and where a lot of
soldiers have what looks suspiciously like an office job. Male and
female soldiers are trying to find an empty Porta Potty in which to get
acquainted, grunts are playing Xbox and watching NASCAR between
missions, and a lot of the senior staff are more concerned about getting
to the chow hall in time for the Friday night all-you-can-eat seafood
special than worrying about little things like military strategy. Of all
the fobbits stationed at Baghdad’s Forward Operating Base Triumph,
Staff Sergeant Chance Gooding is the fobbitiest. His M-16 is collecting
dust, he reads Dickens and Cervantes instead of watching NASCAR with the
grunts, and the only piece of Army intelligence he really shows an
interest in is the mess hall menu. Gooding works in the base’s public
affairs office, furiously tapping out press releases that put a positive
slant on the latest roadside bombing or strategic blunder before CNN
can break the real story. Another soldier who would spend every day at
the FOB if he could is Captain Abe Shrinkle, but unfortunately for him
he’s a front-line officer, in charge of a platoon of troops. Abe
trembles at any encounter with the enemy and hoards hundreds of care
packages, brimming over with baby wipes, foot powder, and erotic letters
from bored housewives. When Shrinkle makes a series of ill-judged
tactical decisions, he ends up in front of his commanding officers, and
Gooding has his work cut out trying to make everything smell like
roses--and that’s just the start of the bad news
Find out more about David Abrams and listen to the program, on the radio
or
online.
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